The Druid's Keep

Well tonight was fun. Blaze came over and then later on Mawce and we watched a movie. Blaze had a bad day, her stupid parents doing the same old thing all over again, yelling at her for no real reasons and making her feel like shit all the time. She's not happy ever anymore it seems, all she thinks about is how much she wants to die or hurt herself and I don't know what to do. I love her and I will always love her and be here for her but how do I turn things around so that she doesn't want to leave. I'm sure that she won't, because of me, among other reasons, but I don't want her to constatly want to. I'm quite an outsider on the whole issue of suicide and self harm and though I can understand some of the reasons and such, I will never be able to know what it's like from her perspective unless I fall into that trap myself. And I do see it as a trap.

On another note. It was nice that Bethany invited us over last night, it's nice to know that she considers me a friend, I should invite her to my house sometime. I've always thought of her as someone who is first a friend to Steph and then to myself but I'm really not sure if that's how she sees things. It's hard to say, whenever we get together Steph does most of the talking just because that's the way it works, but she did phone me so I dunno...

As for school, I really really REALLY need to start my work and actually DO something! I intend on getting very good marks, I only have 3 classes for gods sake! And though I stand by my choices, gettign good grades should not be a problem as long as I actually do the work.

Anyways, Night

-Allanon